The Truth Can Hurt
by Maura-Jane95
Summary: Mariah Blake grew up knowing something seemed off, now at fifteen years old she finds out that she is in fact adopted. Who should she find is her mother but the one and only, Maura Isles. Taken by surprise at her best friend's house, she finds that their mother is best friends with this woman who left her. How will Mariah deal with the truth? Reviews please! My first story!
1. ADOPTED!

ADOPTED?!

The day had started out just as any other day, but as it progressed it just got weirder and weirder. She didn't know what she expected to find in that desk drawer, but after over-hearing her parents talk she had to know. Why had she heard her name and "adopted" in the same sentence? She knew eaves-dropping was a bad idea, and now she found herself digging in the "off limits" desk drawer searching for answers. Oh had she hit a new low today, first eaves-dropping, and now? Now she was looking where she knew distinctly that she shouldn't be. She always figured she was a little different; her eyes were green, unlike the rest of the family's blue eyes, her hair was golden brown, her family all pale blonde, and she was very intelligent, earning A's in all her classes whilst her family had always been of average intelligence and grades. These differences never bothered her much; she just figured it was her parent's genetic backgrounds combining and creating these differences, but now that she had heard the adoption word…

As she continued to search, her brain kept thinking of all the little hints she had growing up. How she was considered a "genius", and excelled in math and science, but that doesn't make you adopted. She was very good at playing piano, any musical instrument really if she tried, her siblings weren't very good. Whereas her siblings were very good at making friends, very athletic, and rather calm, she was not. She was very socially awkward as the other kids thought her boring and they thought she was mocking them. She failed at sports, always trying to figure out how to do something through calculations instead of action. She also found that she was rather stressed the majority of the time, finding that studying for tests was difficult as even though she knew the answers she always feared that she would freeze up on test day. She also was very good at memorizing medical terms, and to her the calmest place in the world was the cemetery. Many people thought she was weird, some were even afraid of her, and she had few friends, two of them were her siblings.

Her older brother Thomas J. was the only person in the world who she had always looked up too, his calm demeanor always made her calm down, and he always protected her. She remembered in the third grade when an older boy had tried to bully her, Thomas J. had stepped in and even gotten a black eye for his troubles. He got in trouble with their parents, but for his little sister he would do anything. In her own grade there were only two people she was friends with, Mikey and Tanya, the twins as other people knew them. Mikey, like Thomas J, was fiercely loyal, and had no problem telling people to scram if he thought they were too mean. He didn't always understand her "science-y talk" as he called it, but if anyone ever insulted her he was ready to fight. Tanya was calmer than her brother, but just as loyal, and just as willing to prove it. Growing up with these two was more than any girl, including Mariah, could have ever dreamed of. Mariah's little sister Alicia, was also one of her friends. Even though they were two years apart, the two could not have gotten along any better. Alicia looked up to Mariah, and always pledged to be just like her when she got older, and who could ever dislike the little girl with the big blue eyes, and curly blonde hair? She hated to think knowing all these people, being related to Thomas J. and Alicia, was all a lie. But it was, oh how big of a lie it all was. For fifteen years Mariah had believed that these people were her family that Mikey and Tanya were supposed to be her friends. Why would she ever have thought any different when she was raised to believe that such was true?

Finally she found what she was looking for, the page clearly saying "adoption" in bold across the top. Underneath she found her own name, Mariah Clementine Blake, and next to it was her real name, Faith Clementine Isles. Her birthdate was the same, October 31st, 1997. Her adopted parents and her birth parents were listed. Her adopted mother being Judy E. Blake, her birth mother being Maura Isles, her adopted father being Patrick J. Blake, her birth father being Ian Faulkner. She paused a moment, noting that she recognized the name Maura Isles, but from where? Just then her IPhone buzzed, and she glanced down reading the message.

**Message From: Mikey Jones**

_Mikey: Hey are you coming over for dinner still? Ma wants to know._

**Message Sent:**

_Mariah: Yeah I'm still comin, I found something…interesting out that I want to share with you and Tanya._

**Message From: Tanya Jones**

_Tanya: _ _Ooooh! What's interesting? _

Of course Mikey would tell her right now.

**Message Sent:**

_Mariah: I'll tell you when I get there._

**Message From: Mikey Jones**

_Mikey: Sorry she was sitting right here, I didn't know she'd text you._

**Message From: Tanya Jones**

_Tanya: Okie Dokie!_

**Message Sent:**

_Mariah: It's okay Mikey, do I need to bring anything over?_

**Message From: Mikey Jones**

_Mikey: Nah, but mom is having a friend over. Some M.E named Maura Isles, I guess she's some kind of genius… and mom said that she talks all science-y like you do. So I guess come prepared to act normal, well… for you anyways :P _

**Message Sent:**

_Mariah: Oh, Ha-ha that was sooo funny. Not. Erm… If she's who I think she is, Maura Isles has A LOT to do with what I'm gonna tell you. _

**Message From: Mikey Jones**

_Mikey: Uh, should I be worried Ri?_

**Message Sent:**

_Mariah: No… I don't think so. I just have a lot on my mind, and some very… surprising news. Tell Ma-Jane I'll be there. _

**Message From: Mikey Jones**

_Mikey: Okay… Well see you then! _

Dinner at the Jones' house was in forty-five minutes and Mariah had yet to get ready. Taking the adoption paper she folded it up and put it in her pocket for safe keeping. As she showered she thought of all the questions she would like to ask Maura Isles, when she realized she couldn't. Not tonight anyways, tonight she would only tell her friends, tomorrow her apparently adoptive parents, and then go from there. _How on earth am I ever going to act normal tonight? Knowing me, I'll probably make it blatantly obvious, stupid hives. _Although she had gotten better about it, Mariah had for the longest time, broken out into hives whenever she lied. Genius that she was, she soon learned it was easier to go around a question, or to stretch the truth then it ever was to lie.

Now out of the shower, she brushed out her golden-brown mane of hair, and let the natural waviness take over a bit before she dried it with the hair-dryer. Looking at herself in the mirror, she realized that she had no idea what this Isles woman looked like, and could only imagine that they looked at least somewhat alike. At fifteen years old, Mariah was surprisingly well built; Her shoulders were broad, but not so much that she looked boyish, her figure already the hour-glass shape of a woman's, a little bustier than most girls at school too. Though her eyes were green, she always found herself somewhat caught off guard when she found the golden flecks that lay deep within the meadow-green. She was also rather tall, and at 5'7" she had been happy to hear that she was done growing. Her fashion sense was odd, as her family dressed a little back-country style, where as she dressed like she was from New York, or going somewhere important. She still preferred sneakers to heels, and in tonight's outfit she had decided to wear her black and white converse. The green cardigan she picked emphasized her eyes, and the blue jeans seemed to slim down her legs, while kissing her curves at the same time. While most girls spent their days complaining about how they looked, Mariah couldn't be happier with her body. The eye shadow she picked was lavender, and the mascara she wore emphasized the largeness of her eyes.

Looking down once again at her IPhone, Mariah realized it was time to go. As she head out the door she yelled goodbye to her parents and headed across the street. The Jones' and Blake's had always been great friends, and curfews between the two houses had never been created. Before Mariah could even knock, the door opened and there stood Mikey. At 6'2" it always surprised Mariah to find that he could fit through the front door. His Curly black hair was longer than Ma-Jane would have liked it, and was becoming more and more unruly, his blue eyes were incredibly bright, and decidedly his father's eyes. At fifteen, Mikey had more muscle then most boys his age could dream of, and they left girls dreaming, Mariah being one of the girls. She didn't even know she had been staring until he moved, opening up the doorway.

"You coming in?" He asked politely, leaving an opening just big enough for her to fit through.

"Oh! Yeah, I am." As she walked by she couldn't help breathing in the smell of Cinnamon that was Mikey Jones. She also could smell lasagna in the oven cooking, and boy did it make her mouth water.

"You had something you wanted to show Tanya and I? Ma's in the other room so we have a minute"

"Yeah I have it with me, Where is Tanya?"

"Right this way."

Mariah followed without question, Tanya was more than likely, fretting over what to wear, but when they got to the other room Mariah froze completely. In front of her was Tanya, talking with a woman about fashion and its many uses. The woman's back was to her, but she could clearly see the woman's wavy golden-brown hair, height, and physique. So far everything Mariah saw mirrored her own image, and this thought kept her frozen in place. Mikey stared at Mariah in concern, confusion clearly plastered on his face.

"Ri?"

Hearing their best friend's nickname, Tanya turned and looked at Mariah, her face mirroring the confusion on her twin brother's face.

"Ri, what's wrong?"

The woman then turned around too, clearly confused by the silence she heard behind her. When she turned she came face to face with "Ri", and her face soon twisted too into confusion. Mariah stood stalk-still, unable to think of anything to say, and incapable of vocalizations. This woman looked just like her in all possible ways, except, in her eyes there were no gold flecks, and Mariah's features were not quite as sharp as this woman's. Mariah had seen this woman before, but not as close, and she soon recognized the softness and warmth in this woman's voice and words. The sudden silence had another person entering the room, concern flickering across her features.

"Maur? Kids? Are you okay?" Jane Rizzoli asked as she came around the corner, then a startled "oh" came out as she realized what the sudden silence was about. Maura and Mariah had finally come face to face, and without even a warning to either of them.


	2. Hold up! You gotta be joking right?

Hold Up, you gotta be joking right?

"Well... this is an awkward change of events" Jane Rizzoli stated, while looking at the two seemingly identical woman.

"Jane… Can I talk to you for a minute?" Maura asked, never taking her eyes off the younger woman.

"uh… Sure Maur.."

Leading the way into the other room, Maura's mind flashed with questions, her first being _why now?_

"Jane… Why did you pick now to do this, or why at all?"

"I don't know what you're talking about…"

"Don't lie to me Jane, you taught me how to tell when you're lying."

"Okay, so I thought it was time that she knew, and that you stopped hiding in the shadows."

"I am not hiding!"

"Hey! Don't get mad at me for this. And you are hiding! Stop lying to yourself Maura! Ever since you gave her up you've been 'playing it safe' hiding, yet keeping tabs on her!"

"I didn't mean for this to happen! I didn't mean…"

"You didn't mean what? For her to find out? Because in that room is a fifteen year old girl who looks just like you Maura! From her build all the way to her facial features! She's even a freakin' genius like you!"

"I know… I know she looks like me; I know she's as smart as I am… I've been to her ballet recitals, her concerts where she played the piano; her adoptive parents have even sent me her grade reports… And those gold flecks in her eyes? They're from Ian, while the rest of her looks like me in every way. I can't deny that she is so much like me. I just wanted to hide out in the background a little longer, for her parent's to tell her she's adopted when they were ready. I didn't expect her to find out like this…" Maura's eyes held a deep pain within them, and her face was contorted trying to hide that same pain. _What am I going to do now? What do I even tell her? I never wanted to give up my baby, the one that now; at fifteen looks so much like me it's painful. If only I had been able to care for her, If only I thought I would be a good mother…_

Jane looked at her friend and could see the pain that resided there, she wished she could help but didn't know what to say.

"Maura… You need to go talk to her, have a little one-on-one maybe, a mother-daughter talk."

"I wouldn't know the first thing to say, Jane."

"Oh it's not hard, I've known that little girl her whole life, she likes exactly the same things as you do."

"She… She does?"

"Yes she does, the weird, science-y stuff you've been confusing me with for years."

"Well, we are both geniuses"

"And modest ones too." She laughed

Maura laughed too, her eyes brightening a little bit at the thought of a true conversation with her daughter. _My daughter, oh how I missed saying that. _

As Maura walked into the other room, she noted the quiet that had never changed in the time she was gone. She also noted what appeared as distrust in her daughter's eyes, maybe even distaste? _Well what did you expect, you gave her up. _

Mariah didn't have an easy time keeping eye contact with this woman who was her birth mother. _Why did she give me up? Was I a difficult baby? Did she hate me? Did she ever even want me? What could I have possibly done to make her want to give me up? _The questions that were flowing through her mind seemed to create a sort-of mental storm and she wished her headache would go away. Looking into this woman's eyes she could see her own reflection, but deeper yet, she could see the pain that was sitting there, and the clear warmth. She couldn't help but wonder how different her life would be had this woman raised her. _Did she ever even love me? _

The clear pain Maura now saw in the green and gold-flecked eyes made her want to grab Mariah and hug her, telling her that it was all going to be okay. Instead she only made a statement.

"Mariah… We need to talk."

"Okay…"

Mariah followed her out the front door and onto the front steps, wanting nothing more than to be back in her room, clueless as ever. _Well, Ignorance is Bliss they always say. _At the same time, the want to leave was slowly being over powered by the want to know more about this woman, the one who left her but the one whom she still felt the overwhelming need to hug and snuggle up too. She found that she wanted nothing more than for this woman to embrace her and say she was sorry, for her to run her fingers through her hair and tell her it was alright. To tell her that giving her up was a mistake and she would never leave her again. _How ridiculous is that, she's never gonna tell you that stupid. She never wanted you. _Part of her believed it, another part argued with her mind, feeling it was a lie._ She did want me, she just didn't know what to do. Maybe she was young! _

"Mariah…" Maura started "The first thing I want you to know is, that this changes nothing."

The voice in Mariah's head all but shouted, her brain completely in accordance now. _Hold up! You gotta be joking right? _


	3. All the little Details

All the little Details

"Well, maybe that's not entirely true" Maura said as an afterthought.

_Woo, that was almost scary._ Mariah thought. As she looked at this woman she realized she wanted to know everything about her, every little detail. Though Mariah didn't know, couldn't know, Maura was thinking the same thing about her.

_How could I have ever missed out on this? _Maura watched those green eyes spark, and she knew just then. That she could never leave her again, not like she did all those years ago.

"Mariah… I want you to know that I never meant to hurt you. Your father and I… Well we just never fit together like I wanted. When I found out that I was pregnant… You have to understand that I wanted you. I always wanted you."

"Then… Why didn't you keep me?"

The hurt in Mariah's voice was obvious, and when Maura forced herself to look at her daughter, the little girl she had given up, she saw tears and pain. She was no longer the little baby that had fit perfectly in the nook of Maura's arm. The baby that had been so small, but in spite of herself had proven to be strong willed. Sure this girl was still as strong, and the intelligence behind those green eyes was still so clear, but she was no longer a baby. Maura wished more than anything that she could take away that pain, even after all the years she had been away from her, her daughter's crying was more than she could bare. She knew though, that she had to tell her the truth, even if it hurt. In the end she would hold her daughter, and she would only let go if her daughter wanted it.

"You have to understand, I hadn't intended to get pregnant. You were a surprise, the best surprise I could have ever had, but a surprise non-the-less. I imagine that at fifteen you know about 'the birds and the bees' as people put it?" Mariah nodded.

"Well Ian had come to visit me one weekend on his way to England. He was only staying for a couple days, and we… uh, we…"_ This is so hard to talk about when it's your own child… _"We had sexual relations." Maura glanced at Mariah and noted that she was listening intently, not a trace of disgust or misunderstanding on her face. She was also surprised to find that she didn't appear to be uncomfortable either. Maura continued on.

"At the time, I had in fact used protection, and I was on the pill, but neither of which worked. In other words, a freak accident of sorts. When I hadn't missed my period, or so I thought, I figured that I was safe, but in a few weeks I noticed some differences. I had gained a little weight; I was craving extremely unhealthy food including substances with white flour, which only use the endosperm you know?" Mariah only nodded, and at her lack of confusion Maura continued again. "This change… It could only mean one thing, so I went to see my OBGYN, who confirmed that I was in fact thirteen weeks pregnant. I told Jane of course, you know her as Mrs. Jones, or Ma-Jane, but she is… she is my best friend, and very much a sister to me, so of course we both were excited to hear the news. Jane herself was seventeen weeks so we knew our children would grow up together; there was only one thing I had to do. I had to tell Ian the good news, and I did; only he didn't believe that it was good news…" At this Maura put her hand over Mariah's and forced her to make eye contact.

"Don't believe that I didn't want you for a second Mariah, because I wanted you the second I thought I was pregnant. I wanted you like you could never believe. Logically, I didn't believe I would make a good mother, from Ian's reaction I knew I would be a single mother at that, which I didn't think I would be good at either. But even though it was illogical, I still wanted you more than anything else. I needed you like I needed air to breathe, but I didn't know if I could do it." Mariah could see the pain in Maura's face, it was plain as day. The need to hug her was overwhelming, but she decided to let her finish the story, and without interrupting too.

"Mariah… Jane and I talked about the options, keeping you or putting you up for adoption, and it was an incredibly hard decision to make… I myself was adopted, and sometimes I wondered why my parents gave me up and it hurt to think about it, that's part of the reason you were never told. I also thought that if you knew, it would be all too easy for you to find me. The decision to put you up for adoption was so hard, but I have known the Blake's for a very long time and I knew they would be good to you. I knew Thomas J. would be a good big brother to you, and that you would be safe there. I have kept track of you all this time, I've been to your dance recitals, your music concerts, I know that you've done amazing in school and have always had straight A's… I didn't want to come in and change all that, to interrupt your life that you have now."

Maura sighed, her eyes were down cast and she could feel the breeze running through her hair. Next to her, she knew Mariah was looking down as well, and she was surprised to feel warmth suddenly on her hand. Mariah had, good-naturedly, put her hand over Maura's, as if in recognition of the pain she felt. When she looked from her hand, up to Mariah's face, she saw understanding and curiosity. "…Please… go on." Mariah said, the softness of her voice almost drowned out by the wind. Maura looked ahead and continued.

"The months leading up to your birth were hard for me; I wanted you so much… The night you were born was a surprisingly warm Halloween night. Jane had her twins a month before, and I was visiting with her in my house when I felt the contractions. I knew what was going on immediately and forced myself to remain calm as Jane drove me to the hospital. Surprisingly considering it was my first time, my labor was over quickly and you were born at 11:53pm, you were 6lbs 14 oz. and 18 inches long. When the doctor handed you to me I never wanted to let you go, you already looked at me with what seemed to be recognition. Your eyes were still blue, and your hair was a light-brown and rather curly. I remember you holding on to my pinkie with your little hands and all I could think was 'Wow, she's mine…' You already had me wrapped around your little finger, and I loved you so immensely... I decided to name you Faith Clementine Isles. Faith because I had faith you would grow up to be someone great, Clementine because of your 'aunt' Jane, and obviously my last name is Isles… I gave you up though, because I thought I was giving you something better by doing so. That by giving you up, you would have both parents, that you wouldn't be surrounded by death with me being a medical examiner, that someday when you found me, you would understand why I gave you up. The truth is, now I don't even know why I gave you up, obviously you've had a good life and the Blake's have loved you, but I wish I had never let you go…" Maura looked at Mariah, the tears were finally starting to break up her speech and she really hoped that she wouldn't find hate in her daughter's eyes. She could deal with denial, distrust, fear, anything but hate. When she looked she was surprised to find understanding and love.

"I understand why you did what you did… and I have had a good life… but I too wish you had not given me up…"

Maura was overwhelmed with the sudden need to hug Mariah, and she did, grabbing her and pulling her close. Mariah was stunned for a second, but then returned the hug, leaning into it and closing her eyes, wishing this had been the hug to welcome her every day. Maura rested her chin on her daughter's head, her arms wrapped around her in a strong embrace, and the tears starting to quietly fall. _This is what I have missed._ Mariah, in return, wrapped her arms around her newly found birth-mother, her head on her mom's chest, listening to the heart beat she wished she could say she recognized. The happiness that Mariah felt seemed to bubble over and make her hug Maura tighter. Mother and daughter hugged each other for what seemed like forever, neither of them wanting to miss anything, and both wishing they had forever. Mariah felt safe there, if only for a moment, enveloped in the smell of what she could only describe as honey dew mixed with fresh spring flowers. Like her mother only seconds before she thought, '_So this is what I have missed'._ She never wanted to let go again, never wanted to say goodbye, never had she been so happy. Snuggled up close to her mom, the only thing that separated them was the opening of the front door.

"Maura, Mariah, its dinner time…" Jane said.

The two women let go of each other, and both smiled.

"Shall we go in?" Asked Maura

"We shall" said Mariah

**Maura and Mariah are getting along great, now what about her adoptive parents? Hmmm… Please Review, and let me know what you think should happen **


	4. New Begginings

**New Beginnings**

A week had passed since Mariah had met and found out about her birth-mother, and they had spent quite a bit of time together. When first trying to decide what to do about her adoptive parents, Mariah had been worried about what they would say or do, the truth being that they were happy she found out the truth. They hadn't wanted to keep it from her much longer, but did not know how to approach the situation themselves, but since she found out on her own it had made it much easier. Mariah was though, having some difficulties with the situation, the first of which being that she wanted to live with Maura.

While Maura loved Mariah with all her heart, and she definitely had room in her house, she knew that legally she could not take her daughter from the Blake's nor could she have enough time to spend with the girl. What seemed simple enough to her daughter, Maura knew in reality it was not. She had given her daughter up, the Blake's were good parents, she did not have the time to give Mariah, and it would not be fair to anyone involved for Maura to just swoop in and take custody of the daughter she had decided she did not want years before. _Maybe not want is too strong of a word, I knew it wasn't a good idea is more like it, _Maura thought. In all the time Maura had been alive there was only one other situation which was just as difficult to approach, and that was the giving up of Mariah. _And look where you are now, for a genius you sure are good at getting yourself into stupid situations. Jane was right; I am the dumbest genius out there. Why did I ever give her up…? _This question had been bugging her for days, and she could scarcely find a good enough answer. Fifteen years ago, raising a daughter as a single parent had seemed like a good enough reason to put her up for adoption. After all, being a single parent was hard, and with the type of job Maura had, it would have been worse. _Who wants a mom, who for a living works on the dead? That would be a great career day speech. "My mom is a Medical Examiner, she works on the dead for a living, and comes home smelling like embalming fluid!" Oh yes, great idea Maura, way to win the #1 Mom award. _Thinking about all this brought up memories, memories she had tried to ignore for the last fifteen years.

**Maura walked into the bathroom for what she imagined was the fifteenth time that day. Never had she felt so sick, as she did at that moment, and having spent a majority of the day puking, she was starting to question if she had the flu.**_ Well I don't have a fever, and this has been going on for a few days, but other than the nausea and the puking that comes with it, I don't feel sick… So what the heck is this? _**Really thinking about it she tried to name all her symptoms, if only to decide whether it was worth a visit to the doctor's office. **_Well… I don't have a fever, I'm nauseas all the time, I've been throwing up every day, I have to go to the bathroom more often than not… It can't be a kidney infection I wouldn't be throwing up… But could it be—_**At that moment her thought process was cut off as a certain Jane Rizzoli came in the bathroom, drenched in sweat and just barely made it to the toilet to throw up. **

"Jane, are you okay?" Maura asked.

"I'm fine… Just freakin' dandy."

"…Was that sarcasm?"

"Yes, Maura, that was sarcasm"

**Jane walked out of the bathroom, and her already unruly black curls were frizzier than normal, some of them even plastered to her sweat drenched face. **_I need to stop diagnosing people. _**Maura thought. **_I need to tell her what's up. _**Jane thought. **

"I… Maura, I have something to tell you." Jane said.

"You're pregnant."

"What..? how did..? Maura what did I tell you about diagnosing people?!"

"I'm sorry! But it's obvious is it not?"

**Jane paused for a minute, and took in her surroundings, realizing that Maura was in the bathroom with her. In the quickness of the moment, Jane had forgotten where she was, and then found herself questioning why Maura was in here too.**

"Maura, why are you in the bathroom…?"

"I haven't been feeling well lately, and I came into the bathroom to freshen up and try and control my urge to regurgitate this mornings' breakfast."

**Jane turned green for a second at Maura's choice in words. The pregnancy was getting the best of her. **_Not feeling well? What does she have? _**Jane thought, worry starting to take over.**

"Maura, what's wrong?"

"Nothing, I've just been vomiting lately, having to go to the bathroom a ton, tired, nauseas… It's probably just the flu or something."

"Maura, you are horrible at diagnosing yourself."

"What do you mean?"

"I mean you're pregnant."

"Jane, I can't be. I'm on birth control, and the last time I had sexual relations we used protection."

"Better check again, that's everything I've had."

"Jane, let's be real, It's nearly impossible."

"Nearly being the key word."

"The pill has a 99% chance of effectiveness and condoms have the same chances."

"I still think you need to get it checked out…"

"Fine, but just to prove I'm right."

**Maura believed she was right, and while part of what Jane said did make sense, 99% was very close to 100%. Despite the chances, Maura called her doctor and made an appointment anyways, and found that Jane was in fact correct. A few months later, Maura found herself confused as to what she should do. When she had made her doctor's appointment she had found that she was three months along, whereas Jane was four. Now, at six months pregnant, she found that Ian didn't want anything to do with her or the baby, her mother was unreachable traveling somewhere in Europe, and she had no idea what she was going to do. **_I can't be a single mother, I'm socially inept, I don't know who my own parents are, my adoptive mother is in a foreign country, my best friend is also pregnant, and I work on dead people for god sakes! How could I ever be a good mother myself? I don't want her to hate me… _**At that moment her phone rang, it was Jane.**

"Hello?"

"Hey, Maura, Care to go out to eat?"

"I don't know Jane, I'm not feeling up too it."

"Come on' Maur, you haven't been out in a couple days, you've missed work, and I know you're stressed out. It can be a girls day."

"Jane…-"

"Please Maur!"

"Okay…"

"Alright, I'll meet you at the 'Dirty Robber' in 10, okay?"

"Alright."

**At the 'Dirty Robber' Jane and Maura had discussed a lot about the months to come. What their plans were, names they had thought about, everything. **

"Do you know what you're having?" Jane asked.

"Yes, I do actually…"  
"and…?"

"It's a girl."

"That's terrific Maur! Do you have a name picked out?"

"Well yes… but to be honest Jane I don't even know if I should keep her.. I mean Ian-"

"Forget about Ian! He was a jerk"

"Jane, I don't want to raise her without a father, I wouldn't be a good mother."

"Maura Isles, if I know anything about you it's that you're a good person, and you will be a great mother."

"Jane, I just don't think I should…"

"Okay… Well I found out what I'm having…"

"That's good, what is the baby?"

"BabIES. I'm having twins."

"TWINS?!"

"Maura! Keep it down!"

"oh my god you're having twins! I'm so happy for you!"

"Yeah, it's a boy and a girl… Mikey and Tanya I think."

"Those are very good names! … Her name will be Faith."

"You're giving her a name anyways?"

"Yes… No matter what, I want her to know I put time into her name. That I did think about her."

**Weeks turned into months, and soon Maura had her daughter. On Halloween of all nights, fitting considering her job. As she held the little girl in the nook of her arm, she thought of all the things she wished could be different. Jane, who had been the one to take her to the hospital, was missing out on time with her own two babies, as she was passed out in the chair next to Maura's hospital bed. The best friend as always, and in many ways, a sister. As Maura looked down at her daughter, she saw many traits and things she wished to never forget. **_Look at her face, so small and round, and oh so pink. Her tiny little hands, and light brown curls. _**As if she knew her mother was thinking of her, tiny Faith opened her eyes and watched with a surprisingly strong focus. **

"For someone so small, you have such a strong will and very intelligent eyes for one so young" She whispered to her daughter. "I wonder if your eyes will always be blue, the way Ian's eyes were blue." **As if in response, her daughter seemed to wink. **"I'm sorry I'm giving you up, I just don't think I can be the mother you need… The mother you should have. You will be strong though, and someday… Someday are paths will cross again, and I will immediately recognize you. I promise I picked a great family for you; they already have a son whom will be a good big brother. His name is Thomas J. The Blake's have been friends of mine for years, they will take good care of you, and they will keep me updated. Jane has also promised to look out for you. Your auntie Jane has two kids you'll be friends with too. I just hope when we meet again, you'll know why I did this, you'll understand why and how I could give you up. I want you to know it wasn't easy, no of course it wasn't. I love you, Faith. I love you with my whole heart." **Her daughter's eyes had never left her, and when the nurse came in and took the baby, she wished she could take it all back. But she knew within herself it was for the better. Waking up Jane, she decided it was time to disappear back into her work, to try and forget…**

The memories didn't seem like they were from that long ago, they still felt fresh, and Maura was forever wounded. It took years for her to come to terms with her decision, and even longer for it to feel like a good decision. When Maura had seen her daughter again, up-close, and face-to-face, she had been taken by surprise, and oh so full of joy it was ridiculous. Now the problem was that she could never leave her again, and she had to explain to Mariah soon, why it wasn't a good idea for her to live with her. At that moment, her pager went off, and she recognized the number immediately, dialing the number from her cell phone.

"Jane, what's wrong?"

"It's the blakes!"

"What about them?!" Panic set into Maura, deep into her bones. "Is Mariah okay?"

"She wasn't home at the time, there was a break in, Judy Blake is dead, her husband is in intensive care, and Alicia is missing!"

"Where's Thomas J. and Mariah?"

"Thomas J is at a basketball game and doesn't know yet, Mariah found them."

"What do I do, Jane? What do I do?" Maura was in full set panic.

"Come down here now, we need answers, and we need to find that little girl."

"I'm on my way!" With that, Maura hung up, grabbed her purse and left. She knew Mariah would need help, and that she had an autopsy to do as well, along with trying to find any clues that would find Alicia Blake.


	5. What do I do?

Never in her life did Maura think that something like this could happen. That she would find herself doing an autopsy on the woman she gave her baby too. Soon it seemed she would be doing an autopsy on the man who shared her baby with this woman. She asked herself over and over how this could have happened, how fate could have played this out with such accurate timing. It was like someone really was making life decisions for her, if only she actually believed in god.

When she had found Mariah and told her what happened the girl had lost it, completely and entirely. This had taken Maura completely by surprise and she did the only thing her mind told her to do, hold her. Mariah held on as tight as she could, and did not seem willing to let go, her body shaking with sobs, tears ruining her mascara, and the whole time she did not let go.

"It's okay Mariah, I've got you and I won't let you go. We'll find out who did this, I promise."

With this promise, Mariah seemed to hold on a little tighter, hoping that her mother was right. Not to soon later, she had fallen asleep in Maura's arms, and not wanting to disturb her Maura had stayed put as long as possible, though it wasn't long before she decided it would be easier to pick her up and take her to Maura's room. They stayed there for a couple hours, Mariah waking up in fits and Maura holding her and hushing her back to sleep. Soon, she received a call from Jane, and Maura told her what happened feeling incredibly concerned.

"Maura, you should probably just keep her at your house, she's had enough happen, if she stays with you she'll be better off, at least for now."

"Jane, I agree with you I really do, but I don't know what to do with a fifteen year old girl, let alone one who's just lost at least one very important person in her life. What do I do?"

"Do what you've been doing, sounds like you've got it down to me."

"Jane I… I don't want to ruin this, she needs someone who can take proper care of her, knows what's good for her, her likes and dislikes, what exactly am I-"

"You know very well how to take care of her, you were just doing it, all you need to do is ask her what she likes, I'll send Mikey and Tanya over later with some of her things, and maybe they can help cheer her up."

"Are you sure this is a good idea?"

"Yes Maura, I'm positive."

She hung up the phone and headed into the kitchen hoping to find something for them to eat for dinner, the only thing she found that seemed suitable for a fifteen year old girl that she could find was iceberg salad, and macaroni from the last time Jane had ate over at her house. It was already proving to be difficult to figure out what to do, and it was becoming stressful very quickly. Just then her phone rang.

"Dr. Isles"

_"Maura Isles?"_

"This is she."

_"We have some bad news about Mr. Blake, we're sorry to inform you, but he's dead. He died at 5:15pm"_

"I see… What about his children? What will happen to them?"

_"The police said that they found a will, we do not know anything of the matters or what the will says, but we do know that the police have it if you would wish to contact them on such matters."_

"Thank you, I think I'll do just that."

She then hung up the phone and dialed a number she knew by heart.

_"Rizzoli"_

"Jane, It's me again, I was informed by the hospital that Mr. Blake is dead, and the police have his will regarding his children."

_"Yeah, we have it. The kids are supposed to go to his sister Jennifer. Except for Mariah."_

"…What exactly do you mean?"

_"It is stated that in the event that both him and his wife were killed, Thomas J. and Alicia were to go to their aunt Jennifer, and Mariah was supposed to be given to 'Maura Isles."_

"What?! I'm receiving custody of her?!"

_"Yes Maura, you have legal custody of your daughter, well… as soon as the correct paperwork is filed and ready. Amazing how this all works out huh? …Maura? ...Maura? …Are you still there? Now is not the time to freak out and hyperventilate Maura! Maura, breathe, okay?"_

Maura had started hyperventilating and freaking out. She wasn't ready for this; she missed fifteen years for god sakes! She didn't know the first thing about being a mother!

"Jane! What do I do?"

_"Well first off, breathing helps a lot. Secondly, just go with what feels right, she's just about an adult, she knows right from wrong, it's not like you have to start from the ground up."_

"What if I'm just like my mother? What if I don't give her enough time? What if I mess up, or she runs away? I don't know what to do!"

_"Maura Dorathea Isles, you are a genius and you're trying to tell me you can't manage a fifteen year old? You're the Chief Medical Examiner for the common wealth of Massachusetts, you speak fluent Serbian, you've helped solve numerous cases, and you want to tell me that you can't handle Mariah? That's just preposterous"_

"Did you just correctly use the word preposterous in a sentence regarding me?"

_"Yes I did and I'm not ashamed to say I used my thesaurus to do it." _

"What would I do without you?"

_"Become a hermit, and possibly a cat lady."_

"That is just ridiculous, I- …hold on I'm getting a call from work."

_"I'll hold."_

-"Dr. Isles"

_"Hello Dr. Isles, it's Susie, I was calling to inform that Mr. Blake's body has arrived and is requiring an autopsy, and the results from the DNA test we did on the hair found at the scene has come back with a result."_

"I'll be there as soon as I can, Thank you."

_"No problem."_

-"Jane?"

_"Yeah, I'm still here."_

"Thomas Blake is in autopsy now, and the results from the DNA test are back… I'm heading over to BPD, what do I do with Mariah?"

_"Take her with you, and leave her upstairs or in your office, she'll be fine."_

"I don't want to traumatize her…"

_"She'll be fine, maybe even some closure of some sort. Especially if she's there when we solve the case."_

"I suppose… I'll be there in about twenty."

_"See you then."_

Maura started packing away the dinner she had made into glass containers to bring with her, and was getting ready to go wake up Mariah when she heard footsteps behind her.

"Maura?"

"Hey Sweetie, I was just coming to wake you up. We have to go to my work now at the police department. I have dinner made and ready to go. You can stay with Jane upstairs, or you can go to my office-"

"Can I go to the autopsy room with you?"  
"I don't know if-"

"please? I'll sit and be quiet, I'll do as you ask, and if you think it's to much for me I promise I'll leave, I just want.. I want-"

"You want closure."

"Yeah…"

"Okay, but if I think it's to much you don't beg or ask questions, you just go to my office or upstairs okay?"

"Okay…"

"Good… Now let's go."


End file.
